Progress

I have not enjoyed the diet so far. I have lost weight but the hunger, grouchiness, cravings are not fun. I would not recommend it to people, but will stick with it since I started it. I had a little cheat on Friday and ate 2 cookies ( I thought I had already messed the diet up by eating artificial crabmeat and decided that if I was going to mess up I better eat something really good.) I spent some time trying to convince myself I am not miserable, just hungry and then I have tried to remember other people who have had to be hungry for a period of time to convince myself it is not that bad. Two weeks from today I can have eggs for breakfast instead of lime water and will be thrilled! I just registered as a mystery shopper and hope to add some more adventure to my life!

HCG and Learning

I am hesitant to write about this. About a year ago on CNN there was a girl who had lost her job due to the economy and decided to take the opportunity to get healthy and freelance write about it as well. She wasn't successful and I don't want others to share in my failure if I fail. I am trying the HCG diet. I heard about this diet over a year ago when I was pregnant with Gideon. My sister was going on the diet and she said since I was pregnant I should do it (it uses the hormone your body makes when you are pregnant). I was too sick to even think about it. There was nothing about pregnancy that I wanted to inject into my body. Pregnancy has never been fun for me. The only time that I choose to do something pregnancy related when I wasn't pregnant was when I was on my mission. I took prenatal vitamins to try to help my hair grow out faster from a bad haircut. (I wonder what the clerk thought who sold me the prenatal vitamins and KY Jelly [to help with chronic bloody noses] as a missionary). I digress. Anyway, here I am a year later. I am not nursing Gideon because the Dr. told me to stop. He wasn’t gaining weight when I was. I would normally still be semi okay with my post pregnancy body, but since I am not nursing him I am feeling a push to get things moving in the right direction faster than usual. I have tried many diets and have exercised my body to extremes without weight loss. So here I am trying something I wasn’t even willing to consider a year ago. The science behind it seems sound. I am nervous about two things: 1) will the 500 calorie no sugar/no fat diet (including oils in lotions and makeup) drive me crazy and 2) will I gain the weight back even if I lose it? I have to say that this will be the longest I have gone without sugar EVER in my life. I tell myself that I can do anything for 23 days. Then there is a maintenance period after the 23 days where you are off the 500 calorie diet but still without sugars and starches. That is supposed to stabilize your body’s new set point. I have to look at this one day at a time and start with tomorrow.

I am also learning more about the Atonement which excites me. Elder Scott’s talk last April about the Atonement got me studying and trying to learn more. I was able to start to get some answers last week and it is exciting to me. The Lord always seems to take time to teach us things. Corban is complaining that learning in school is hard. We tell him it takes work. The Lord is the same way. It takes work for us to learn things. But at the same time, when we live in a world where we point and click on a computer (and that is still mortal, take it to an immortal level and it would be even faster) and can find almost anything, it is painstakingly slow to learn in the Lord’s infinite time frame. Luckily, it always seems worth it in the end. Hopefully, Corban will find that out about 5th grade as well.

Fingerprints

My kids had Thursday and Friday off of school, and I was excited. We spent Thursday at the dentist. Then I was babysitting for a friend and my girls were not as nice as I thought they should be. Friday, I thought we would have time to do all sorts of fun projects together. I am teaching Kjerstin to sew and we have some PJ pants to make. We could make Halloween cookies. I wanted to go to the library. If they didn't want to, I could do my own projects like refinishing my table. They pretended like they had earplugs in and couldn't hear me all day! I was getting nothing done and neither were they with their chores! Corban had some homework to catch up on and some scouting to do. Kjerstin and Brynna played (or fought like cats and dogs) most of the day. My day was NOT what I had planned. My kids were having a great time, though. And I felt like I was cleaning up mess after mess! Then I read this quote:

"What is most important almost always involves the people around us. Often we assume that they must know how much we love them. But we should never assume; we should let them know. Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved."
President Monson

In this same talk he said,
"Be aware that the tiny fingerprints that show up on almost every newly cleaned surface, the toys scattered about the house, the piles and piles of laundry to be tackled will disappear all too soon and that you will—to your surprise—miss them profoundly." – President Monson

It made me stop and remember why I am doing all this. I am so grateful for prophets to help us see through the fog, or the fingerprints!

Time

This last week was interesting. I spent time on Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday doing things for myself (Dr. appointments, hair cut, chiropractor appointment, book discussion group) all of which I had to get a babysitter and had time to myself (that elusive sought after golden orb that disappears as soon as we think we have it). I enjoyed myself more on Friday than all those other days when I volunteered in Brynna’s class. I think service is amazing. I felt more refreshed and fulfilled after that than all the other activities combined. (By the way, I learned at my book group that C.S. Lewis and J.R. Tolkien were friends, and Tolkien introduced Lewis to Christianity). While I think it is still essential to take care of the necessary, I think we don’t always want what we think we want. When we follow the course the Lord has set for us with His example, we will find that happiness that Lehi speaks of when he states, “Men are that they might have joy.” I think the three rule of conference included: following the living prophet, living so you qualify for the Holy Ghost to receive and act on it’s promptings, and our agency and time must be used wisely. I think following the Savior’s example of how he used his time in service applies there.
I also was reminded I have amazing friends this week. I have a friend who agreed to do a feelings journal with me so I wouldn’t have to do it alone (because I think it is a dumb assignment). I have a friend who watched my kids for me. I have an amazing husband/friend who drove home from Boise early to come to a book discussion with me, who works hard so I can stay home with our kids and is on duty when he is home helping me with cooking, chauffeuring etc. I feel very blessed that they gave up their time to serve me!

Couples

One of the people I visit teach is a counselor. She has been trying to get me to go to these Discovery Trainings that her workplace does on relationships. It is about $400 for a 2 day class. Bridger is not excited about spending that much money on it and also it is hard to find time for a 2 hour date much less a 2 day workshop. Well, her employer decided to do 1 free evening class. Bridger already had 2 other commitments for that evening but he rescheduled and went with me. It was very interesting. I think the thing I took away the most was that you have to love a person/situation before a change can occur. I have always thought of it the other way. When you are finally sick of a situation, it is when change comes. They used Sister Hinckley's quote about her first year of marriage: “We loved each other; there was no doubt about that, but we also had to get used to each other. I think every couple has to get used to each other. Early on I realized it would be better if we worked harder to get used to each other than constantly try to change each other." In phases my kids go through that drive me crazy I think the same applies. I have heard that quote before but I never really applied it to all the relationships I have.
It was also very interesting because I realized what an awesome husband I have. We were supposed to be practicing reflective listening where you repeat what you hear the other person say. As we were doing this, I realized Bridger does it all the time. He is really good! I on the other hand, could use a little more practice. I ended up buying Wendy Watson Nelson's book, "Rock Solid Relationships." In it she states that a study of the gospel can answer more relationship questions more than studying relationships. She says like we were immersed in the waters of baptism, we need to immerse ourselves in the scriptures. I really liked that analogy. I am still reading but liking it. It was so nice to have time to work on our relationship even if it isn't broken!
PS To top it off we got to spend 20 hours driving in the car over the weekend talking a good part of the time. Spending time with my husband? Priceless!

Brynna

Well, we celebrated Miss Brynna’s 6th birthday today. We celebrated her 1st birthday right after we moved to Pocatello. I look at Gideon and see my Brynna, five years ago. I can’t believe how the time has gone by. She is such a special little girl. So very loving, and a tease! I remember being in the temple when I felt impressed that it was time to have another baby. She was such a good baby. So cute! Her hair stood straight up all over her head like a porcupine. She is loving kindergarten. We went to Lava Hot Springs on Friday night and she got to take a friend with her. She had her birthday dinner today with her grandparents. She has basically grown up having them right here. What a lucky little girl! I feel like I have been so busy getting it all ready and done, that I am glad it is over. Kind of like I felt six years ago when I delivered her! Ironic, isn’t it!

Getting Busy

We took the kids canoeing on Monday for Labor Day. Besides Corban complaining the whole time that we were going to die, it was a good experience. It was so peaceful on the water. The kids talked about the Savior walking on the water. I am so grateful for primary teachers who teach them all the things I haven’t taught them yet.
Starting this week, Brynna will be finally regularly attending kindergarten. She left on the bus with her older siblings for kindergarten on Wednesday and didn’t look back. She will be going all day every other day. All the kids activities will also have started up. We started hockey already. This week we add TaVaci and dance. I hope we survive. I read a blog post about a mom who pulled her kids out of all their activities because it was too crazy. It is crazy but I believe it is worth it. We limit how much they can each do but it is important to let them develop their talents and experiment and grow. It is also Brynna birthday a week from today so I need to do some shopping and planning!
Brother Osguthorpe ( the Sunday School General President) was in our sacrament meeting today. He said her always gets asked what it is like being with the General Authorities. He said he has learned 3 things: to have a sense of humor, there is an urgency to the work, and to understand who we really are. He was here to do a fireside tonight for teachers. He talked about Doctrine and Covenants 11:20- 21
20 Behold, this is your work, to akeep my commandments, yea, with all your might, bmind and strength.
21 Seek not to adeclare my word, but first seek to bobtain my cword, and then shall your tongue be loosed; then, if you desire, you shall have my dSpirit and my word, yea, the power of God unto the econvincing of men.
Then he used Sister Beck’s comment from her talk last April: “The ability to qualify for, receive, and act on personal revelation is the single most important skill that can be acquired in this life.”
We need to keep the commandments, obtain the Lord’s word (which includes the scriptures, modern prophets and personal revelation) and desire to share if we want to be effective teachers. He said we have great teachers in the church. We need to give our students more work though so the revelation will be to them as well as us. It was all very good and filling of my spirit.